This Is Italy
During one of my internet searches I came across a movie called 'Ten things we love about Italy'. Although my first reaction was critical because I ten things really didn't like it much, the film, on the tones of the pizzica di San Vito, is definitely worth watching. And it fits perfectly in the atmosphere of friendship.
The first scene with the mommy eating pasta immediately reminds me of one of our first invitations to my very good friend Carmine's house. In Calabria, friends of friends get the same honors and so it happened with us. Salvatore and Armando, my two brothers from another mother, introduced us to Carmine and his family.
Cozy warmth in winter
In February, the days around carnival, while in Belgium everyone is sitting behind the stove, after a few days of skiing and snowboarding in the Silla area, we were invited to the family's 'garden house' near the beach.
The wooden 'garden house' is suitable for gathering twenty to thirty people around one table and is equipped with a grill, a pizza oven and other cooking utensils, but is mainly equipped for enjoying long meals with family and friends on summer evenings.
February, so certainly not summer, but the mild temperature outside, the 25 souls close to each other and the various pots and pans on the boil provided a cozy warmth with a nod to summer.
Carmine has a carpentry or joinery, for me one of the most difficult Italian words to memorize and pronounce. Depending on the season, he is also a passionate and gifted hunter and fisherman. So the intention of that evening was to, us Belgians, de boar, to have them taste the wild boar, which has been shot on its own, prepared on its calabrees.
La mama and the hunter
This assignment was passed with maximum honors, thanks to the ladies who prepared and contributed everything as a team. A team needs a leader and that role was reserved for a small busy woman, mom, which like a real one boss advised and coordinated the other women on their cooking assignments.
After the antipasto, which was a meal in itself, came the primo de tagliatelle with wild boar sauce followed by the wild boar. This one secondary was the only dish that had been touched by a man's hand. One of the hunters, recognized as the best boar-preparer, had been stirring the large marmite with the meat for 3 hours.
He will only pass on the recipe, his best-kept secret, to his sons. Some ingredients, besides the wild boar, are known, but important ingredients are certainly also the respect and love for the product, the tradition and the friends.
Dolce, caffe e amaro
Afterwards there was the obligatory dolce, caffe e amaro. The men around the table, served by the women, arguing. No problem would remain unsolved, the world would be better off if everything did not remain a dead letter, as so often happens with men.
In the meantime, the women are chatting while washing the dishes and tidying up. At the end of this story, the women have tackled the problems and almost solved them. All that remains is to put the men to work for this.
Proof that equality or dominance between the sexes is not expressed in parity of the number of seats in a council, places on a list, etc., but in who actually decides and has it implemented. Behind every man there is a strong woman.
Nice to be able to stay in this company as a stranger, from a Belgian perspective, to be fully absorbed and to be able to enjoy the intensity of being together. Friendship or friendship is not something to be laughed at here! Grazie mille Salvatore, Armando, Carmine e tutti gli altri.
Text and photos by Luc Vleck, a Fleming who is becoming more and more Italian
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