Column: Roman traffic troubles

In the past weeks I experienced a strange, almost shocking sensation in 2 different cities, Madrid and Groningen. If I wanted to cross, the cars would stop before I could enter the pedestrian crossing!

I was no longer used to that, because things are different in Rome: the motorist accelerates precisely there to be just ahead of the pedestrian who threatens to get in his way. In practice, this often leads to a dangerous game of prestige between the pedestrian and the motorist.

The first can nevertheless cross and force the other to a wild stop, but that is not without risk. If things go wrong, you are in your right as a pedestrian, but that is little consolation for a few bruised ribs or worse.

Eye contact helps to make the right assessment: if the man or woman behind the wheel looks too grimly ahead, then it's better to forget it. I myself often raise my right arm as I cross the street in a kind of belated fascist salute, which still inspires enough awe to bring the relentlessly onrushing rolling stock to a halt.

Albeit with many a dirty look from road users who consider themselves victims of an unreasonable restriction of their freedom of movement. When I cross a pedestrian crossing with my bicycle, I strategically push it one meter in front of me.

That also helps, because the Roman motorist is at least as afraid of a dent in his bodywork as he is of a fellow man crossing the road.

With 70 cars for every 100 inhabitants, including infants and the elderly, Rome is one of the most car-rich cities in Europe, and it shows.

The overpopulation of 'grunting beasts', as Bordewijk once aptly described them, has all kinds of unpleasant consequences: crowds, traffic jams, noise nuisance, triple parking, smog and quarrels drawing on an almost infinite reservoir of indecent terms and obscene gestures.

And then, of course, an all-consuming stress, which often leads to completely irrational reactions, such as the hysterical honking in traffic jams, which really does not resolve any faster.

Motorists in a hurry at intersections also have the habit of only stopping at the zebra crossing, or even beyond it. (An officer is never present to check that anyway.) As a result, they have to be warned by honking drivers behind when the light turns green and therefore move later than if they had stopped neatly before the stop line.

For those who, like me and a handful of other enthusiasts, cycle through the Eternal City, the exuberance of the Roman motorist calls for great caution.

So:

Drive slowly and in principle to the far right; avoid the life-threatening slalom through traffic jams, which causes hundreds of mopeds and scooters to crash every year; don't be rushed by angry honking behind you; do not respond to provocations from frustrated drivers; watch out for the many holes in the Roman road surface; and especially watch out for suddenly opening car doors.

If all that works out, you will reach your destination even sooner by bike.