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The real Italy

This time I present a short comic piece on the occasion of the publication of my book The Real Italy - Stories from everyday life.

This book includes many of the columns published here over the years, plus some new ones, such as the little story that follows.

The intention is that the book gives an overview of what can happen if you live in Italy for a longer period of time and do the daily things that everyone has to do: to the post office, to a restaurant, to the municipality and so on.

Occasionally things happen to you that you, as a non-Italian, find strange, ridiculous, comical or irritating. All these events together give you an image of Italy as you do not know it as a tourist, an image of the real Italy, the Italy of everyday life.

Interested in my book? It is for sale as paperback, at your local bookstore or online, but preferably through this link (so that your beloved author has something left over instead of bol.com):

An ebook can also be downloaded via this link.

And here's a short story from the book:

In traffic

'Let's see, yes I think it's possible,' the driver of the Fiat mutters to himself and slowly accelerates. He is on a side road of the provincial road, wants to turn left and has to join the passing traffic flow.

"No, not!" the driver now yells in fright and steps on the brake. His engine stalls (also startled?). 'Holy shit!' the owner yells. The car that startled the Fiat driver crawls past painfully slowly. He could have easily done it, he realizes and starts the engine again.

Due to the failed insertion attempt just now, the Fiat has moved slightly forward and sticks its nose a bit on the provincial road. A continuous stream of cars is now coming from the left, each time with just such a mutual distance that he cannot get between them. Of course nothing comes from the right now.

"They seem to care," the Fiat owner mutters annoyed. The drivers of the cars coming from the left see a Fiat that wants to merge and is already halfway in their lane. They are afraid that he will suddenly shoot forward and slow down just to be sure. Much to the chagrin of the Fiat man who is now almost shouting to himself: "Porca giuda! If they are close, they also slow down. Why? wow, wow, hurry up!'

Finally, there is a hole in the flow from the left. Hooray, the driver thinks, looks to the right and sees another car coming. What now? He estimates the speed and… No, he's too close already. But still nothing comes from the left. So fast? No, too risky. Or not?

At the very last moment, the Fiat driver takes a chance and turns left. Once on the provincial road, he has to immediately switch to three, but in the process he loses so much speed that he almost comes to a stop.

The driver approaching him sees that, to his horror, the Fiat only inserts at the last moment (he had darn hours) and already brakes a bit, but now has to fully anchor in order not to crash into the stationary Fiat. 'Ma che cazzo! What a dick! If you can't drive, stay home!'

🇮🇹Reading tip: Want to read more fun stories about life in Italy? You can find it in the three parts 'Italiaanse Status' by Stef Smulders, available at bol.com.

Written by Steve Smulders

Stef Smulders is a Dutchman who emigrated to Italy in 2008 with his husband Nico and dog Saar to start a B&B there. He sold his house, left family and friends behind and took a leap into the unknown. In 2014, almost five years later, he reported on his experiences in the book 'Italiaanse Toestanden'. About buying a house with a fickle real estate agent, renovating it with a stubborn contractor, but also fun and educational encounters with special Italians. 'Italiaanse Toestanden' is now the highest-rated Italy book on bol.com and has been translated into English, Italian and Spanish. In 2016 he wrote the sequel: 'Meer Italiaanse Toestanden' and in 2017 part 3, 'Nóg Meer Italiaanse Toestanden' was published. In 2021 Stef published his first collection of very short comic stories, under the title 'Bezoekuur en 99 Andere Korte Komische Verhalen'. Very recently the collection 'Het Echte Italië' about daily life in Italy was published. All information about Stef and his books can be found on stefsmulders.nl.

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